How Your Memory Is Trying To Sabotage Your Relationship
Your memory is not your best friend.
We’re notoriously bad at remembering things, which makes birthdays, anniversaries, and names slippery to handle.
Another study shows that we overestimate our ability to recall memories, meaning when we have a good idea, it’s always best we jot it down.
And if that’s not bad enough, another study shows when we try and remember things our minds start changing and distorting them so we can’t consciously grasp what we’re trying to.
But the brain betrayal doesn’t stop there, when we’re in a relationship our memory tries to tell us that we were happier single.
British organization School of Life, an organization which helps people develop emotional intelligence, breaks it down in this video.
The video shows how in a relationship, your mind resorts back to the memories when you were single and happy — even if those days were not that great.
How we recall memories plays a major part in how we handle the situations in front of us. That is why the yelling match between you and your girl always brings you back to the time when it was just you, your bong, and the Playstation.
It works the other way around, too. When we’re single, we’re drawn to the allure of having a significant other, failing to take into account the stress, bickering, and nagging that comes with it.
So next time you’re thinking of jumping ship, remember, it’s your memory playing mind games with you. Working against our own rationalizations is key to getting a real sense of what we want to do, rather than doing what you feel.
When we breakup with a girl it should be a decision that weighs not only the good memories versus the bad ones but on the long-term effects of everyone involved.