Change Of Scenery: How To Meet Women In A New City
Sometimes life takes unexpected turns.
You may have a good job, a solid apartment and be pretty happy with the city you live in, but things can change overnight.
Let’s say you get a new, better job but it’s in a city you’ve never been to before?
This shouldn’t be a deterrent from personal success, but the idea of having to leave a city with its own customs and rituals that you’ve become well-acquainted with is particularly daunting.
You’ll have to find a new place to live, get to know the area as best you can and perhaps most challenging of all you’ll have to find out how to pick up girls all over again.
It won’t quite be the same as if you were starting from scratch, but geography has a lot to do with what girls respond to in the way of attraction.
A girl in LA may not find the same things attractive as a girl from Brooklyn, and the approach you used in Dallas might fall flat if you visit Anchorage.
But you don’t have to worry if you’re getting ready for a big move. It’s not impossible to learn the romantic ins and outs of a new city.
It just takes a little time and knowing where to look for the right opportunities.
The first thing you should do, if possible, is try to find a place that’s relatively close to the bar scene, if there is one.
It’s not essential, but it’ll make things easier when you’re heading for your first night on the town.
Let’s say you meet a chick and she’s down to come over, but you live on the outskirts of the city, rather than right in the center.
It’s not a deal breaker if you have to take a cab or the subway, but it can kill the mood if you don’t keep the energy up.
When you’re apartment hunting, do some research about the area, see what’s around and factor it into your decision.
Also, in tandem with finding a place, try and get a feel for what the scene is like in the city. Is it a college town? A city that’s heavy with clubs, or is it a quieter city with pubs and dive bars?
Maybe it’s a city full of artists and musicians, like Seattle or Austin. Regardless, you should know this kind of thing ahead of time.
No one is saying you have to change your identity to match the area you now live in, but you should be aware of what other people are interested in, and what they do for fun.
Maybe you’re coming from New York and there was a pretty good club scene, but you’re moving to a place like San Diego where people surf and hang out on the beach.
Just be aware, and make sure you have an open mind.
You’ll be a stranger coming to town, but it’ll make the transition easier if you can appreciate the hobbies, interests, and vibe of your new landscape.
This tip is important for both making friends and meeting girls. You should strive to meet as many people as possible, and build up your social circle.
It’ll make you more attractive and seem less like the new guy.
A big mistake a lot of guys make is they only focus their energy on meeting girls, and not building up a social circle that includes everyone.
You might be great at talking to girls, but if she finds out you’ve been living in the city for six months and haven’t made one friend, it’ll seem weird and make you look socially inept.
Don’t be afraid to spend some time just making friends with people. It’ll make you seem more fun, and will even be an opportunity to assemble a small crew for when you’re out at night.
The idea is to go from stranger to local within a year. Your goal should be to appear as if you’ve been living in this new place for as long as all of the new people you’re meeting.
It’s not an easy task, but just requires stepping out of your comfort zone and talking to new people. Remember, you did it at home, and you can do it here.
When it comes to actually talking to girls, try and listen closely for patterns in what they love about their city.
Maybe there’s a place to get pizza at 4am that everyone likes, that you’ve never heard of, or there’s one bar that makes this drink everyone knows about.
Just pay attention, and also try and keep an eye out for what other guys are doing that appear to be successful with women.
If you really want to be able to adjust to your new surroundings, you have to observe and then apply what you see to yourself.
It’s one of the best ways to learn, especially in a setting that’s completely unfamiliar to you.
If possible, try and befriend a guy who lives in the new city and knows the landscape. Hang out with him when he’s out gaming.
This is probably the quickest way to see exactly what it takes to get good and to learn the best places to meet girls. Not to mention, it always helps to have an experienced wingman.
Whatever you do, don’t rely on someone else to introduce you to girls.
The point here is to learn by watching someone who knows what they’re doing so you can get comfortable, not to expect your new wing to be a tour guide.
So, if you are moving and are worried about your dating life just be aware that it’s not impossible to blend in when you’re in a new setting.
It just takes a little time, and may even only require a few small tweaks to what you’re already doing. Look at is as a challenge or even a positive thing.
A new city means a whole new pool of girls to talk to, so don’t waste time worrying.
Leave your new apartment as often as you can, and start taking over.